Expectations: Disappointment or Opportunity?

Expectations are something we all have; and they either reinforce or deteriorate our relationships. What we forget is that expectations are about us. How do we view a certain situation or interaction with another person? If they're not clearly communicated and agreed upon, they remain one-sided. Once they are communicated and any compromises are considered, they become an agreement, allowing everyone to be heard and understood, thus alleviating resentment and confusion.

Think about areas in your life where you have an expectation. This could be in your business or home. Consider where these expectations are not being met. Have you clearly communicated with and made an agreement upon your expectation with all those involved? Were you able to remain open to consideration of another's point of view and come to an agreement? If not, you're still in a one-sided expectation.

Business Expectations

In business, there are expectations of employees and of their leader(s) to foster a work environment/culture that's mutually understood. It's important to know the difference between expectations and goals. Belinda Wee, Associate Professor at Husson University, believes that expectations are behaviors that occur while completing a task that supports the common goal. When our behavior is in alignment with the overall good and is clearly communicated, tasks flow in a manner that's consistent with the company's messaging and purpose.

How do you set expectations and what's the benefit of having expectations which support your goals? It all comes down to clear communication and providing examples of why expectations are important to you and your employees. When a clear picture is painted of how adhering to expectations accelerates growth, your employees are armed with knowledge and clarity.

Expectations should reflect both owners’ and employees’ best interests.

- The Marcus Business Team, Managing, Setting, and Raising Your Business’ Expectations

This is where the fun begins. Everyone is on the same page and the goals of the business are clearly defined based on the behavioral expectations. As a leader, you can step back from micro-managing because you know your staff is informed and on-board. This is the opportunity for individuals to shine in their specific zones of genius while delivering an outcome that's beneficial for all. Goals are being monitored and met and, according to Brenda Neckvatal, “What gets measured, improves.”

Personal Expectations

Now, think about how expectations work in your personal life. According to Sneha Tete, certified relationship coach, the common denominator between personal and professional expectations is that they both involve relationships. In either arena, you are interacting with someone with whom you have a relationship. The fundamental components to having fair and easily communicated expectations are:

• Respect
• Understanding
• Emotional support
• Patience

Using these components to build your relationships will only improve what you've begun to build together, while also establishing a foundation that's rock-solid.

Where relationships struggle is in a difference of expectations rather than focusing on the aspects that you appreciate in each other. When you value appreciation over expectation, you foster compassion, respect, quality time, consideration, effort, and lack of comparison. Isn't this how we should all interact with each other? Dropping the judgement and truly searching for where there is commonality and how you can grow from it?

The Starting Point is You

When you consider expectations, remember that they can be both a road to disappointment and an opportunity for agreement. It depends solely on how you wish to interact with and engage with those closest in your life. The starting point is always you. Next time an expectation either works or doesn't, look in the mirror and ask yourself, “Did I stay in integrity with my highest self?”, because at the end of the day, you are the only thing you can control.